What I didnt Know and Thank You for Not Telling Me

I know this is The Most Exciting Day of your life! From the moment you said YES, your life has been a whirlwind. Some days are happy, some are frustrating but you are Married now and you should begin your personal narrative. Every detail that you gave to your special day should be recorded. There will never be another day quite like this one. When you have children, your daughters and sons will want to know your ‘Rite of Passage’. We all have our weddings  videotaped or  on live stream which to me, is the lazy way to hold memories. Be kind to your future generations and write those spectacular ( or not so spectacular memories) down in a  journal….. make it your story. You know, “The Happily Ever After” one.

I remember the day I got married. The sewer system overflowed and poop..yes..POOP flooded into the backyard. We were suddenly herded into the front yard for pictures. We never walked out onto the pier and JUMPED which was our plan.

My husband and I chose my in-law’s vacation home on the Outer Banks to have our wedding. You know gorgeous views of the sound, a pier in which we were to walk out and have glorious photos taken and instead, we found ourselves in the front of the house, having a good old fashioned North Carolina BBQ with crabs to boot. We had people blowing bubbles for our wedding favors and it was really surreal. But why were we in the front with the pine trees and everyone’s vehicles? I never knew that the septic tank overflowed until years later. But it still makes for a good story……

My husband had a ton of siblings and I had to choose my Matron of Honor, Maid of Honor and my bridesmaids and try to be fair about it all. We were an older couple both in our early 30’s. Looking back now that seems really funny. Both sets of parents wondering if they would ever be grandparents. My Grandmother, my 4 closest friends and my Mother and my step-dad were all there. My Best friend brought my favorite food, Korean Kim Bab, and no one wanted to eat any. I went barefoot because I couldn’t find any shoes to suit me. Then my panties showed through my wedding dress so I didn’t wear any. Then my bra strap kept slipping and I threw that out too. So my Mother-in-law said, “What should I put in the newspaper, the Bride wore nothing but her dress?”

We decided to take a “funny” picture where my husband and I mooned the wedding party before we got into the canoe to sail away. That particular roll of film was to be developed only by us. Well, like Murphy’s law, that roll of film got piled in with the others and ultimately developed by my Mother-in-law. A very strict and devout Catholic so much so that everyone called her,” Saint Mary.”

It has been 17 years and I am so thankful that I have these memories. It is the only collection of photos and well wishes from every single person in our family. That is when My Mini-Memoir idea was born! I wanted a collection, a scrapbook, something to share our 1st year anniversary…similar to a baby book. No photos…. this is different. Be Immortal!!

We have since lost my Grandmother due to a stroke, my stepfather from pancreatic cancer, 3 brothers-in-law, Saint Mary,  and my beloved  sister-in-law. They are still part of me and I can reminisce on My Special Day. Poop and all.